One More Thing
We all know the feeling. Nearing the end of our task list for the day, we have just three more things to do…two more things…one more thing. But as the last one approaches, we start thinking, “Well, I’ve already gotten a lot done…I really have been productive…I don’t need to do all of it today…” As we think, we open up Netflix or Instagram and slowly forget about that last piece of our task list. Later in the evening, or the next day, we regret the decision.
We often move the goalposts of success from “good” to “good enough.” Teenagers have a special gift for this—they do the bare minimum to get you off their back. At times, you have probably allowed your child to get away with doing less than they were originally supposed to do. How do we deal with this slip in motivation and self-expectation?
As a caveat: if your child is unwilling to try this task management tip, you probably will not find much success. But if they really do want to improve their productivity, try this out!
You need to add one more thing to your task list. After all, you know that the last thing you do will, in all likelihood, not get done. So, take one item that does not need to get done right away, and add it to the end of your task list. For your child, this might mean getting ahead on a piece of homework for the week, or spending fifteen more minutes studying for the upcoming test. The challenge of biting off a little more than you can chew puts the right amount of pressure on you to get things done. When before you accomplished four tasks instead of five, now you will accomplish five instead of six.
Yes, this means that you might still feel the strange combination of guilt and relief you get from not finishing your task list, but at least you will have finished everything you really needed to finish. Frame your task list not as the bare minimum to accomplish but as the ideal list of tasks; think, “It would be great if I could get all these things done.” If you get less done, no problem. It was a bit of a stretch goal anyway. This does not mean, of course, that you can add an infinite amount of tasks to your list and still finish all but one—if adding tasks increases stress instead of productivity, you might want to look at some other task and energy management techniques.
So if your child struggles to sustain motivation, encourage them to try to do just a little bit more. They might be surprised at what they accomplish.